SEXUALITY THROUGH IFS LENS WITH PATRICIA RICH

SEXUALITY THROUGH IFS LENS WITH PATRICIA RICH, CLICK HERE!

When Patty first became interested in IFS, she thought it would be useful in the treatment of sexual dysfunction. Then, as she learned the model she got curious about how sexuality “lives” in the internal system.

Now she believes that IFS is not only extremely useful in the healing of sexual dysfunction and trauma, but also for navigating today’s complex landscape of sexuality in a Self-Led way. She brought her insights to the IFS Annual Conference first as a half-day session and then as a full-day Pre-Conference workshop. She just completed teaching a four-month module on Self-Led Sexuality for the IFS Institute’s Online Continuity Program.

Learn more about her offerings at www.relatingwellcenter.com or by joining her private Facebook group Self-Led Sexuality with Patricia Rich.

8 C's of Self (Energy/Awareness) -- ifs --internal family systems

From: Dick Schwartz, PhD., ifs - internal family systems definitions adapted by Don Elium, LMFT

“Self Awareness Energy” is defined as the element of the inner world that can function with:

I. Calmness - n. 

1. a physiological and mental serenity regardless of the circumstances 

2. the ability to react to triggers in your environment in less automatic and extreme ways 

3. to be less vulnerable to adopting the common fight-flight-freeze response when threatened

II. Curiosity - n. 

1. a strong desire to know or learn something new about a topic, situation or person 

2. to have a sense of wonder about the world and how things work 

3. genuinely interested in non-judgmentally understanding something or someone 

III. Clarity - n. 

1. the ability to perceive situations accurately without distortion from extreme beliefs and emotions 

2. the ability to maintain one’s objectivity about a situation in which one has a vested interest 

3. the absence of preconception and objection 

4. the ability to maintain a “beginner’s mind” in which many possibilities exist 

IV. Compassion - n. 

1. to be open heartedly present and appreciative of others without feeling the urge to fix, change or distance from them 

2. an intuitive understanding that the suffering of others affects you because of your connectedness to them 

3. to simultaneously have empathy for others and a belief that the other has a Self that once released can relieve his or her own suffering 

V. Confidence - n. 

1. to maintain a strong belief in one’s ability to stay fully present in a situation and handle or repair anything that happens with the belief that “no matter what, it’s all okay and will all work out the way it can” 

2. to have healed from previous traumas and learned from previous failures to such a degree that their effect does not spill into the present 

3. to understand that mistakes are only lessons to be learned 

VI. Courage

1. strength  in the face of threat, challenge or danger 

2. the willingness to be take action toward a goal that others would find overwhelming 

3. the ability to recognize the damage we do to others then take action to make amends 

4. the willingness to reflect and “go inside” toward our own pain and shame, carefully examine it, feel it and act on what we see

VII. Creativity - n. 

1. the use of the imagination to produce original ideas 

2. the ability to enter the “flow state” in  which expression spontaneously flows out of us and we are immersed in the pleasure of the activity 

3. the ability to create generative learning and solutions to problems 

VIII. Connectedness - n. 

1. the state of feeling a part of a larger entity such as a partnership, team, community, or organization 

2. a connection to a meaningful purpose or a higher calling above the circumstances of daily life 

3. to be in a relationship with someone who truly knows and accepts you for who you really are 

4. to be able to relax your defenses with others as you know that you won’t be judged or controlled and are not afraid of getting hurt because you have confidence that you can repair any damage or misunderstandings that may occur

You're the one you have have been waiting for . . . The 8 C's of Self (awareness)

“In his TED talk, Mark talks about how connected moments of vulnerability become critical in seeing the truth. Mark also talks about how good marriage therapy actually helps us to transform our deepest negative feelings like anger into fierceness.

In his TED talk, Mark talks about how connected moments of vulnerability become critical in seeing the truth. Mark also talks about how good marriage therapy actually helps us to transform our deepest negative feelings like anger into fierceness.

Mark says the best way to transform negative feelings like fear into courage, shame into humility, and grief into compassion, is by turning towards our pain, rather than away from it.” —- From https://kerimbaran.com/2020/04/08/the-8-cs/

Protectors

Development of IFS - Dick Schwartz

Liz Brenner, LICSW, talks with Dick Schwartz, Phd, about how he developed the IFS model. Dick starts the conversation talking about his own family context, some of his early work experiences and then his days as a family therapist. He reviews some of the critical ideas from family systems therapy that supported his developing ways to work with the internal system. Dick defines Self and Parts. This interview occurred a few weeks after the Center for Self Leadership's Annual Conference celebrating thirty years since Dick first began to conceptualize IFS